broken roads
by tatty ted
Summary: Sometimes it's easier to tell a stranger than someone you know and trust. - —Connor/OC. /Oneshot, set after Series 8, Episode 14.


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**broken roads**  
_keep bleedin', keep, keep bleedin'._

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He doesn't feel anything after his mother's confession, the confession he wasn't meant to hear. He's numb inside, his heart shattered and his world blown apart. The man he thought to be his father wasn't his father, he was the product of rape.

_He_ was the product of rape and it all slotted in place, everything he'd been through these last couple of years. The alcohol addiction his mother suffered from, the emotional and physical abuse she put him through. It wasn't her fault, it was just everytime she looked at her child, she was reminded of his conception.

He doesn't know where to go or who to turn to. Imogen knew the truth about the fire and didn't want anything to do with him. There was Kevin but he wasn't too sure if he wanted people to know, the one thing about school was it didn't take long for gossip to spread.

He ends up at the beach, throwing pebbles into the sea. Well trying to skim them across the water but he'd never been good at that, even as a child. He throws another stone and then turns to the side, sensing that he wasn't alone.

He's right, he isn't.

Beside him mimicking his actions of throwing stones into the sea was a girl, around the same age as him. She was able to skim the pebble across the sea and Connor watched her for a moment, wondering how she could do it.

She caught him watching and laughed. As she threw another pebble, she turned to him, "Finding it hard to do it?"

When it came to girls he was shy, it had taken him a while to pluck up the courage with Imogen and they were friends first. So to have a stranger talking to him, made him feel more nervous. He nodded at her question and she slowly walked towards him.

She showed him how to skim a pebble across the sea and as she handed the pebble to him, he took a go. Surprisingly it skimmed the sea and landed with a splash at the bottom of the sea. He turned to the girl and smiled.

Neither of them said anything for a moment before the girl broke the silence, "Do I not get to know your name?"

"Do I get to know yours?"

The girl smiled and sat down, "I'm Shona, just Shona."

"Connor," He smiled softly and threw another pebble, "How did you learn to do this?"

She threw the pebble in the air and caught it in her hands. She did this a couple of times before she looked at Connor and answered; "My father taught me when I was a child, we've come here every weekend since the age of five."

"That's sweet."

"He's dead!" Shona answered and there was nothing spoken between the two. The only sounds surrounding the two of them were the sounds of pebbles hitting the water and the engine of cars on the bridge.

"How come your here? I mean, take a look around it's nothing special. Most people, like me come here to think. What's your reason?"

He sighed deeply. He wasn't sure if he was ready to tell anyone that he was the product of rape. If he told someone it would be real. He was in denial, he was trying his hardest to tell himself he'd made a mistake, his mother didn't say she was raped.

He looked the girl in the eye and answered, "I overheard something I shouldn't of, it's made me realise my whole life is a lie."

There's a pause as he throws another stone in the sea, "The man I believed to be my father isn't. I'm—"

"Your what?"

There's another pause as he collects his thoughts. He's confiding all in a stranger that he'll probably never meet again. He didn't think it was wise but he was desperate to tell someone, he couldn't keep that to himself.

"I'm the product of rape."

Shona drops her pebbles on the floor and stares at Connor for what seems like an eternity. As she bends down to retrieve her stones, she looks back at Connor and replies back; "You're the product of rape? Wow, you poor thing. Have you spoken to your mother?"

Connor shook his head and sat down, "I wasn't meant to know."

Shona nodded and remained silent, she threw the rest of the pebbles in the water before joining Connor on the floor. She touched his arm gently, a soft smile on her face, "You need to talk to your mother, tell her you're not angry with her."

"I'm not."

"Then what's wrong?"

He sighed; "I've just realised that everything she's put me through is because of _him_, the man who raped her. Every time she looked at me she was reminded of the day she was raped and concieved me. I'm not angry, I understand why she did what she did."

"You understand?"

He nods and Shona squeezes his arm reasurringly, "Then tell her you understand, tell her you forgive her for everything she did. You both need to talk to one another. It's not easy for you but it's not easy for your mother either. How old are you? Sixteen, seventeen? She's lived with this for all that time and never told anyone. She's most likely hauted by what he put her through but she's brave too."

He didn't say anything, he just stared at the ripples in the sea. Shona took that as her cue to continue talking; "Your mother loves you a great deal, she's shown that for the fact she kept you, she didn't abort you or give you up for adoption. She loves you and whatever happened, has happened."

Connor nodded, Shona was full of good advice, "But what—"

Shona cut him off with a small smile, "Go home and tell your mother everything you told me. The only way you two can move forward is together and through communication and I can't do that for you. You have to do that yourself."

He nodded again and stood up. He looked down at the girl and wondered if he'd ever see her again. As he said he hoped to see her around, he walked away, heading towards home. He was going to take the advice, he was going to tell his mother he knew the truth.

But it wasn't going to change anything because Connor finally understood, he finally understood why his mother was the way she was.

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**jottings** — how sad was the last episode of waterloo road. i mean, i really wasn't expecting that from christine but it all makes sense. humf, if you like it enough to favourite/alert, please leave a review:3


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